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5 Ways to Meet People in AA

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On the surface, it seems easy. You walk into the room. Stand at the podium. Introduce yourself. “Hi. My name’s Molly. And I’m an alcoholic.” Everyone responds, “Hi, Molly,” and suddenly you’ve got a room full of friends. In reality, meeting people in AA isn’t nearly that easy. At least, it doesn’t seem like it to the new person showing up for the first time at an AA meeting. To him, it seems like everybody’s known everybody for years, and it’s intimidating.

But that’s not the case. Regular AA meeting goers see people come and go all the time, and while each and every person in the Rooms wants to give back, they also want to see some effort on your part to show that you’re committed to recovery.

To get over the initial barrier, here are five easy ways to meet people in AA.

Ask About Coffee

Meet People

After a meeting, see who’s going out for coffee and ask if you can join.

AA and coffee; they go together like cops and donuts. After just about every 12-step meeting, no matter where in the world it’s located, at least a few members go get coffee. It’s what you do. If you’re really serious about staying clean, you’ve got to be a little uncomfortable, so get out of your comfort zone and once the meeting is over, ask the person next to you who goes out for coffee. If it’s not her, she’ll point you in the right direction. Go introduce yourself and ask if you can tag along. The worst thing that can happen is they say no, but chances are they won’t.

Come Early and Stay Late

AA meetings are typically held in church basements, community buildings, or town halls. That means before every meeting, things need to be set up and after every meeting is over, things need to be torn down. Show some initiative and volunteer to help. This gets you in contact with the individuals who are part of that meeting’s home group and allows you to get to know them.

Strike Up a Conversation

While it may sound easy to just strike up a conversation, you know that’s not the case. Instead, make a reason to talk to someone. AA meetings are filled with different types of literature from the Big Book to step work. Ask someone who looks like they know what’s going on if there’s any literature available. If that’s not an option because everything’s lying out on a table, thank someone who spoke about a point they made that really impacted you. Get talking.

Bring a Snack

Everyone loves food, and recovering alcoholics are no different. Whether it’s dip and chips or rice crispy bars, bringing a snack draws attention to you and gives other people an opportunity to strike up a conversation. Waiting for everyone to get a treat post meeting is an easy excuse to hang around, giving you a chance to reach out and introduce yourself to others.

Work the Program

There’s a reason the old adage, “for the program to work, you’ve got to work the program,” is still around. Because it’s true. Even if you don’t feel like the people in AA meetings are receptive to you, don’t give up. Continue to work the program, find a sponsor, and begin your step work, instead of worrying about making friends. When people see you working the program, focusing on your recovery, friends will naturally appear.

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